The Story of a Heart Bag

The Story of a Heart Bag

One autumn day my step-mom asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I am sure that at the time I was trying to get through school so Christmas gifts were the last thing on my mind. Oddly enough I do keep ongoing lists throughout the year of random things that I need for my own good so I remember reading her that list because my apartment is packed. You know how at every holiday you receive gifts that you are not quite sure how to use although you love the idea that the person thought of you and bought you a gift? That's how a gift that my step-mom bought me was  it was a bag that folded into little pouch. I LOVED IT simply because I love little things that are really useful but I had no clue how I was going to use it .Nor did I know the many uses for the bag.

While I was still in college I kept it in its little pouch in my backpack just in case…. Just in case….. just in case…well that's a WHOLE different story. Now that I'm not in college I wasn't sure where I wanted to put the bag so I always had it-- I knew it could be useful. In many coffee shops/restaurants (okay, McAllister's is the only restaurant I know of that this is the case but I have to include it because it is a hometown restaurant) you get some sort of discount if you have your own cup….wait, what am I thinking, I just got back from Dickey's BBQ where they also do that and yes I have a Dickey’s cup and McAllister cup oh and a Starbucks cup (okay it's  Starbucks cup but they will give a discount for bringing any cup of your own). While I was in school I just happened to have a random cup in my backpack when I will go to Starbucks. However, now that I'm no longer in school and job searching/writing/reviewing every day I have so much more time to go to one of the three places I mentioned. Note that I do keep a bottle of water on me just in case I get stranded somewhere and cannot reach a discounted drink station :-/. How in the world do I carry all that stuff on my wheelchair with my front seat being my backseat being my driver seat and my trunk?

Think about the back seat and all of the odds and ends that fill your car. Maybe you are a clean car person who doesn't carry anything but your registration and legal documents necessary, well this story isn't for you. All my family has tons of stuff in her car whether it's my sister has a zillion kids only half of which are her own, my mom who has files in one section, pots in another section (she is a Potter, no she does not smoke it), my step-mom….. Well she's one of the clean ones although it does get filled with plants quite often. And my dad… where should I start…. There's a little bit of this and a little bit that, plus uniforms for the wrestlers, munchies in case we all decide to hop in the vehicles and go somewhere (even if we're just going to his mom's house), it's  always good to have a munchie.

My car is my electric wheelchair. It's my front seat, back seat, glove box, trunk, it’s everything! I have many bags (like grocery bags) but those are for groceries and get tore up enough (yes even cloth bags) with the boxes I jam into them and the fruit that I put in its own bag so it will not get ruined…. Well needless to say, most of the time I come home with an unintentionally prepared fruit salad—Bon a petite.

Oh, back to the heart bag. It was something that I got for Christmas that I

could use somehow but had been kept in a backpack. Now that I'm out of school looking for a job, I often go to random places to get a refill as I sit there and write (although more often at these times ideas are formulating and most of the writing occurs at home). That sure is a long introduction or maybe that is the point I want to get across…. There are times in life when you may "assign" objects to uses, people to activities or places, or even (Oh I am excited because I know this is something people do subconsciously) assign a scent to place and when you smell that smell it triggers a memory. The memory contains people the people were from your past….

Oh no, the bag… So I got this heart bag that I now use for my various different cups to go get refills all across town as I try to formulate stories. As I was at Dickey’s today wondering how God would show up today (it was after 3 and I had no clue what I was going to write. I turned around to pull out my Dickey’s cup. God said…you are that bag to me. Now write. I had no specific plans for the use of that bag heart but I was sure it was going to be so useful, often people (I seriously don't know who these people are that I am referring to) have their own ideas of how God will to use them and if they don’t/can’t see themselves as being used in that certain way they turn from God and do their own thing. This is coming out of God now because I was not planning this….. My cousin wanted to go on a mission trip possibly with the group, you know do an awesome mission trip with fellow believers….. Well she ended up spending a lot of her summer in not a very organized situation. She was in a different country without anyone she knew and she stayed there the amount of time she had signed up for. Not even sure there was running water. This relates the bag how? Well, I didn't see much use for the bag at first, but now it is my favorite bag to go on adventures throughout the town and gather stories with. The part it plays? The bag holds all of my refillable cups. Maybe the reason behind doing something the Holy Spirit is nudging you towards isn't obvious or has no instant gratification. Go for it, do it anyways! My cousin might not see how her service was used at all or why she went to Kenya, but in the meantime have patience. You’ve answered the call and are just waiting for a response. We may think we are answering our Call like I had pans designed for that bag, but the plans God has are far greater than what we can even fathom. 
THANKS BID!!!

Not alone climbing this mountain!

I got home from helping my sister (I actually carried some boxes all by myself without crashing jnto the wall or falling!!!) and started to cry…but why?? I am so excited to see that my sister has such a nice roomy house for her family!
I ccouldn’t imagine why I was crying. Well I had that one professor that said it was good to cry for at least 5 minutes a day but I haven’t found scientific evidence for that yet.

God’s word started to come to mind…”Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.” Deuteronomy 31:6 I was meditating on that when I received a text message:

“Here is a song for you. Kimi, your life is in the hands of the Maker of Heaven. May He fill you with His peace.”

Climb This Mountain - WorshipMob - Our Passion

Climb This Mountain

youtu.be

Still Rolling

Still Rolling

At Starbucks yesterday I rolled in and sat to my usual spot. I happened to be right next to a man who was later joined by his wife.  I started talking to this man and quickly realized that he was the whole reason I thought I needed to stop at Starbucks. 

The man was part of the narcotics police team in another state when he was injured which forced to medically retire. We talked about experiences since our life altering incidents and the similarities that we had regarding experiences, health factors, and faith proved to me that there is definitely a reason we are both here and it is totally being used by God.  Speaking of  people who are put in an undesireable situation and manage to find Earthly benefits Aunt Renae was told she has cancer and since then she has not only hiked her first 14er, but she’s hiked most of them that in Colorado! GO AUNT RENAE!!

I was headed home and reached the place where, in the past I would start crying for no reason so I thought okay Kimi, see something that makes you think of a depressing thought and  start crying because that's how it would generally happen. Then I thought “God is so good and always puts me in the perfect places at perfect times why would I cry? Okay, for those of you who have read about my crazy incidences being caught in the rain while searching for schools I was supposed to sub at…. Well those reasons just haven't been revealed yet, but I'm sure there are  reasons but right now just isn’t the time for them to be revealed.

Epiphany for the day….so far….Women’s clothing sizes come in even numbers and Juniors sizes are in odd numbers.

Epiphany for the day….so far….Women’s clothing sizes come in even numbers and Juniors sizes are in odd numbers.

As I was putting on my pants this morning I looked and saw they were size 7. I figured they had to fit as I was just in a size 4. Well getting them on was not much of a problem but buttoning them? There was no way!  So I ran to Ross quickly (for those of you who do not know my running actually means jumping in my Hot Rod (wheelchair) and ridding it full throttle to the store.

I get to the store and realize the couple pairs of white pants that remained were not my size or even close to my size. So I told Kim (the Ross employee ) that I going home and would just wear black pants because I couldn't find anything that will work. I went home and opened my dawer of dress/black pants where I surprisingly found many other pants that my aunt had given me. Although some of them were not my style, I pulled out one of the pair of white pants but they were a size 4. Without thinking about what could happen I just put them on and…. THEY FIT!!! This this leads me to the conclusion that Junior-sized clothing comes in odd numbers and Woman-sized clothing come in even numbers. However before I publish this on the Internet let me make sure that is true….. This is basically true except for the pesky juniors size 0. Well I suppose that the conclusion I drew is still valid because zero is neither even more odd.

Oh yes back to my story, so the pants fit fabulously and before I knew it I was being picked up for my lunch with Cowboy Bill. Unsuprisingly Bill looked all cowboy-like totally living up to his cowboy name. We ordered this fabulous lunch deal at Olive Garden were you pick an entree to eat then and you pick another that is given to you for later consumption. I wonder if my friend who doesn't eat leftovers (he calls them re—heats) would eat these because you're not reheating them as when they are heated to be even it will be the first time we are heated. So before you think all I'll money there if all they do is keep up their food, their is only a select number of entrées you can choose from for this fun lunch deal.

I only made it to the tail end of the Write-Up group although I made it just in time for what I needed to learn.  At the meeting Ken encouraged me to continue blogging as a way to get my name out there. When I told him that my blog was basically an elaboration of my journal, he told me that journaling was how the first blog/blogging got started.  WOO-HOO I am doing something right!

Crackers Anyone?

Today I went to Dickey's and stayed there for a long time just thinking. Prior to going to Dickey's I stopped at the bank and transferred some money. I happened to put a pack of peanut butter crackers in my purse for some unknown reason (besides the fact that I'm weird and just go to Dickey's to get potato salad or coleslaw and enjoy the free ice cream) bringing crackers to a restaurant is not too normal. However, I felt the random need to bring crackers so I did. As I mentioned I stop by the bank as I was there I had to empty out my purse to find my wallet on the counter in front of the bank lady. As I was doing this I rambled on about each thing I pulled out my purse. Starting with the crackers I set them on the counter said "I have no clue why I have peanut butter crackers.” This led her to tell me how she loves butter crackers and that they remind her of her grandmother because her grandmother also loved peanut butter crackers and they would eat them and have such a good time together.    By golly this was the reason I packed peanut butter crackers to go to a restaurant! So the crackers were her's all along I only had to deliver them.

I was also notified that a friend of mine, Rob will be MIA on Facebook for a little as he wants to pray and fast to see where God is leading him. I am totally excited that he is doing this now, before we ever meet in person. He's coming down soon to meet Worship Mob sooner than later and to visit a friend who recently moved here at which time will probably meet.

            As I read over what I just wrote, I remembered that I don't need to be a mat and let men run over me or let guys make all the decisions; with God's leading I need to take control of my life until he meant he has picked out for me and I meet.

I am totally all over the place when I blog, but I guess that's just a view into how my brain works. With that being said, as I was going to sleep last night-- we had so much fun at Bible study it lasted for a while and putting my mind to rest after that was nearly impossible. I was thinking about what a friend had told me after seeing a picture of Rob.

God is totally transforming the mind, heart, and spirit. Where at one time all that I cared about was those books of myself and others, I am now learning that looks can diminish in the blink of an eye. In my car accident I could have been totally disfigured but praise God that didn't happen. So rather than focusing on looks that may be here today and gone tomorrow, I am learning to focus on a person's spirit. If one's spirit is focused on God, he is same yesterday, today, and forever (Heb. 13:8).

The Lord’s Business

The Lord’s Business

            Recently as I was at the local Christian bookstore I ended up purchasing several cups. Having no idea what I was going to and use them for besides giving a few to certain friends at Church, I was zipping around town with bags full of clips on the back of my wheelchair. This didn't allow me to ride on bus in the proper position at first although eventually it was corrected.

Because I was going to The Perk me up with a friend (who I haven't seen in five years) soon I thought that I would just give him one of the cups although it had no significant meaning to our friendship. I also had picked out a few cups that I wanted to give certain friends at Church; however when I got back home from meeting with my friend I realized that I did not give him the cup. I asked God why I still had the cup and then thoughts of the work my new friend is doing for the Lord surfaced. I thought, now THAT is courageous-- the cup I was going to give my friend says “Courageous.” I began to shake with excitement and had so much emotion inside of me.

With my friend being given visions of this plan three years ago and pieces of the plan slowly being confirmed excites me but at same time as it simultaneously reminds me that God’s time is certainly not like ours and well, it excites me even more! Noah was told to build a huge ship in the mist of a drought. Crazy? To the world, yes. But did the ark eventually become needed?  Right.   

Ecclesiastes 3:11 (ESV) He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also, he has put eternity into man's heart, yet so that he cannot find out what God has done from the beginning to the end.

Comes in Like a Lamb and out Like a Lion???

I woke up and got ready to start my day and it was only 6 o'clock am and I was ready to meet with Levi (we had plans on meeting at noonish). I took the bus downtown and we located each other we had lunch at a new favorite, East Coast. I felt really awkward not knowing where I was while downtown since I was not on my usual "stomping grounds." However, I did feel a little better when I visited a fire station downtown although I had to explain that I just like to hang out at the station . After which I visited with the lieutenant and B shift. Even though only a few of them were there, the crew was full of a typical firefighter joking and they were pretty happy crew!

 

When Levi was taking me back to the bus station I was getting very impatient because his assistive device cannot go fast (he has a go-go like Bill had). When I finally got home…actually I never got home because I remembered that I needed to pick up a few things before tomorrow so I stopped by a store to do that. It was dinnertime when I finished grabbing what I needed from the store when I remembered that I had a coupon for a meal on Tuesday at the BBQ pit next door. I was excited, very excited -- not about the BBQ although the BBQ is so good, but I was excited about the free ice cream!

After I ate I got ice cream. While I was eating ice cream I had time just to sit there, by myself listening to songs that brought back memories and memories turned on the tears. Therefore I started crying so  I left the restaurant and ran into a man right outside the door who said, "you are so beautiful!" Disbelieving that God could answer a prayer that quickly (a prayer asking God to help me focus on Him and not myself so I would quit crying in public), I turned and looked at him and tried to give them a nasty look and said “Why in the world would you say that?” Almost like I expected an apology from him for calling me beautiful. He was explaining and I was asking him questions…. Completely random questions like where went to school when he was in high school and other awkward questions. We were eventually separated by various incidences.

As I was leaving my, attention was drawn to a man at a table about service dogs.

This man and I were talking about service dogs and of course I was able to share what God has done in my life through my accident. This, in turn, had him share how God had already been using the "sit at the service dog table" volunteer position as a total way to reach people... Like in my situation, I started talking about service dogs  and why were needed. As soon as there was a communication pathway between us, God took the reins and only He knows what is to come.